Marriage

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!

That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The
woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly.

Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again. In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that everyday for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife’s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is
holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair

was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her.For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of
intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office… jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind… I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore. She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

Moral Lesson:

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank, blah..blah.. blah. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for
each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

“I will keep a smile on my face and in my heart even when it hurts today. I know that the world is a looking glass and gives back to me the reflection of my own soul. Now I understand the secret of correcting the attitude of others and that is to correct my own.

 

Giving tree

A long time ago, there was a huge apple tree. A little boy loved to come and play around it everyday. He climbed to the tree top, ate the apples, took a nap under the shadow. He loved the tree and the tree loved to play with him.

Time went by. The little boy had grown up and he no longer played around the tree everyday. One day, the boy came back to the tree and he looked sad.

“Come and play with me,” the tree asked the boy.

“I am no longer a kid, I don’t play around trees anymore.” The boy replied, “I want toys. I need money to buy them.”

“Sorry, but I don’t have money. But you can pick all my apples and sell them. So, you will have money.” The boy was so excited. He grabbed all the apples on the tree and left happily.

The boy never came back after he picked the apples. The tree was sad.

One day, the boy returned and the tree was so excited. “Come and play with me” the tree said.

“I don’t have time to play. I have to work for family. We need a house for shelter. Can you help me?”

“Sorry, but I don’t have a house. But you can chop off my branches to build your house.” So the boy cut all the branches of the tree and left happily. The tree was glad to see him happy but the boy never came back since then. The tree was again lonely and sad.

One hot summer day, the boy returned and the tree was delighted. “Come and play with me!” the tree said. The boy said, “I am sad and getting old. I want to go sailing to relax myself. Can you give me a boat?”

“Use my trunk to build your boat. You can sail far away and be happy.” So the boy cut the tree trunk to make a boat. He went sailing and never showed up for a long time.

Finally, the boy returned after he left for so many years. “Sorry, my boy. But I don’t have anything for you anymore. No more apples for you.” the tree said.

“I don’t have teeth to bite.” the boy replied.

“No more trunk for you to climb on.”

“I am too old for that now.” the boy said.

“I really can’t give you anything. The only thing left is my dying roots.” the tree said with tears.

“I don’t need much now, just a place to rest. I am tired after all these years.” the boy replied.

“Good! Old tree roots is the best place to lean on and rest. Come, come sit down with me and rest.”

The boy sat down and the tree was glad and smiled with tears.

Lessons to Learn From Heart Touching Story:

This is a story of everyone. The tree is our parent. When we were young, we loved to play with Mom and Dad. When we grew up, we left them, only came to them when we need something or when we are in trouble. No matter what, parents will always be there and give everything they could to make you happy. You may think the boy is cruel to the tree but that’s how all of us are treating our parents. So Respect Parents and help them when they really need you, Love them, Take care of them.

 

The Fence

There was a little boy with a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper to hammer a nail in the back fence.

The first day the boy had driven thirty-seven nails into the fence. Then it gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence

Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out a nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper.

The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence.

“You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When we say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won’t matter how many times you say ‘I’m sorry,’ the wound is still there. A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one.”

The moral lesson of the story:

Before saying things when we are angry, we need to make sure that we cool down our heads first. Why? We might say something that we will regret later on. We cannot take back what we have said, and even if we are being forgiven with what we have said, still it will leave them a scar that will remind them that we have once hurt them.

“Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.”-Isaac Newton

 

Dad’s gift

A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer’s showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted. As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation, his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautifully wrapped gift box. Curious, but somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible, with the young man’s name embossed in gold. Angry, he raised his voice to his father and said “With all your money, you give me a Bible?” and stormed out of the house, leaving the Bible.

Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.

When he arrived at his father’s house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father’s important papers and saw the still new Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. And as he did, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer’s name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words PAID IN FULL.

How many times do we miss life’s blessings and answers to our prayers because they do not arrive exactly as we have expected?

 

A Date

After 21 years of marriage, I discovered a new way of keeping alive the spark of love. A little while ago I had started to go out with another woman. It was really my wife’s idea.

“I know that you love her,” she said one day, taking me by surprise.
“But I love YOU,” I protested.
“I know, but you also love her.”

The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my mother, who has been a widow for 19 years, but the demands of my work and my three children had made it possible to visit her only occasionally. That night I called to invite her to go out for dinner and a movie.

“What’s wrong, are you well?” she asked. My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news.
“I thought that it would be pleasant to pass some time with you,”
I responded. “Just the two of us.” She thought about it for a moment then said “I would like that very much.”

That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous. When I arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our date. She waited in the door with her coat on. She had curled her hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel’s.

I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, and they were impressed,” she said, as she got into the car. “They can’t wait to hear about our meeting”.

We went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy. My mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady. After we sat down, I had to read the menu to her. Her eyes could only read large print. Halfway through the entree, I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me.

A nostalgic smile was on her lips. “It was I who used to have to read the menu when you were small,” she said.

“Then it’s time for you to relax and let me return the favour,” I responded.

During the dinner we had an agreeable conversation, nothing extraordinary - but catching up on recent events of each others lives. We talked so much that we missed the movie. As we arrived at her house later, she said “I’ll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite you”. I agreed.

“How was your dinner date?” asked my wife when I got home.
“Very nice. Much more so than I could have imagined,” I answered.

A few days later my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn’t have a chance to do anything for her. Some time later I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place mother and I had dined. An attached note said: “I paid this bill in advance. I was almost sure that I couldn’t be there but, nevertheless, I paid for two plates one for you and the other for your wife. You will never know what that night meant to me. I love you.”

At that moment I understood the importance of saying, in time: “I LOVE YOU” and giving our loved ones the time that they deserve.

Nothing in life is more important than God and your family and friends. Give them the time they deserve, because these things cannot be put off until “some other time”. Anyone that means something to you - you should spend time with them and let them know how much they mean to you as often as you can.

 

The Wooden Bowl

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and a four-year old grandson. The old man’s hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together nightly at the dinner table. But the elderly grandfather’s shaky hands and failing sight made eating rather difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass often milk spilled on the tablecloth. The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. “We must do something about grandfather,” said the son. I’ve had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor. So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner at the dinner table. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl. Sometimes when the family glanced in grandfather’s direction, he had a tear in his eye as he ate alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old watched it all in silence.

One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, “What are you making?” Just as sweetly, the boy responded, “Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and mama to eat your food from when I grow up.” The four-year-old smiled and went back to work. The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening the husband took grandfather’s hand and gently led him back to the family table.

For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled. Children are remarkably perceptive. Their eyes ever observe, their ears ever listen, and their minds ever process the messages they absorb. If they see us patiently provide a happy home atmosphere for family members, they will imitate that attitude for the rest of their lives. The wise parent realizes that every day that building blocks are being laid for the child’s future.

Let us all be wise builders and role models. Take care of yourself, … and those you love, … today, and everyday!

 

The Golden Gift

Some time ago, a friend of mine punished his 3-year old daughter for wasting a roll of gold wrapping paper. Money was tight, and he became infuriated when the child tried to decorate a box to put under the tree.

Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift to her father the next morning and said, “This is for you, Daddy.” He was embarrassed by his earlier overreaction, but his anger flared again when he found that the box was empty. He yelled at her, “Don’t you know when you give someone a present, there’s supposed to be something inside of it?”

The little girl looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said, “Oh, Daddy, it’s not empty. I blew kisses into the box. All for you, Daddy.”

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little girl, and begged for forgiveness. My friend told me that he kept that old box by his bed for years. Whenever he was discouraged, he would take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there.

In a very real sense, each of us as parents has been given a gold container filled with unconditional love and kisses from our children. There is no more precious possession anyone could hold.

 

Daddy’s Little Girl 爸爸的小女孩

If I had my life to do over, 生命若可輪迴，
I’d have chosen you to be my dad 當為我父再次。
once more.
Even if it meant losing you again, 就算再次分離
It’s worth all the tears in the 贏取世上淚水
world.
You were my sunshine when skies 天暗您為我光，
were gray.
I loved you and honored you; 我敬您，我愛您
You took all my tears away. 為我拭盡淚水，
I was happy to be with you, 快樂有您相隨，
Proud to be your little girl. 女兒為您而驕。
Sometimes we would argue, 就算有所爭辯，
But to me you meant the world. 您仍是我一切。
Your love was always pure; 您有純潔的愛，
You treated me as your own. 愛我猶如愛己。
Your time seemed all too short and 生命如斯短暫，
I feel so alone. 令我更覺孤單。
What can I take from this? 思我所學所得？
My heart is completely crushed. 我心盡碎盡失。
But nothing loved is ever lost - 但您遺愛人間，
And you are loved so much. 愛您之心永存。

 

My Father (For You Daddy)

Every daughter likes to think 為人女者皆想，
That her father is the best, 自己父親最棒，
But there’s no doubt for me, Dad, 但我毫無疑問，
That you’re far above the rest. 您是無人能及。

When I was a little girl 憶我年幼稚時，
You took time to play with me. 抽空伴我遊玩；
You’d wrestle, read, or color, 您曾動靜皆宜，
Though so tired you would be. 永不訴說疲倦。

You knew that play was not enough 您知只求玩耍，
To make the greatest dad. 難成偉大父親。
You also shared God’s love for me, 卻教同沐主愛，
And for this I’m very glad. 與我共享天恩。

Your godly life has made you 上主為您典範，
The best father there could be; 成就最佳家嚴；
You’ve followed God’s example 聖靈為您引導，
Of what a father should be. 非凡父親啻造。

I love you, Father, on this day 爸爸我所敬愛，
As well as on the rest. 從今直至終點；
No dad on earth compares to you. 世上無人能及，
You simply are the best. 我父始終最好。

************************

God saw you getting tired 「主」已察覺您倦，
When a cure was not to be. 皆因藥石不靈。
He closed His arms around you 祂輕抱您身軀，
And whispered, ‘Come to Me’ 說：到我跟前來。
In tears we saw you sinking 淚海中您漸沉，
We watched you fade away. 靈魂正在消逝；
Our hearts were almost broken 我們傷心欲絕，
You fought so hard to stay. 您為生命而戰。
But when we saw you sleeping 但見瞑目長眠，
So peacefully from pain, 安祥遠離苦痛；
We could not wish you back 請上路，莫回頭，
To suffer so again. 莫記塵世痛苦。
So keep your arms around him, 求祂環抱莫棄，
Lord, and give him special care 護我父，莫忘記；
Make up for all that he suffered 從此無痛無苦，
And all that seemed unfair. 不平事，皆作古。

 

Line to Heaven 天堂電話線

Does Heaven have a phone number? 請問有天堂的電話號碼嗎？

Papa went to Heaven, 據說爸爸去天堂，

but I need him here today, 我要找他來幫忙；

My tummy hurts and I fell down, 肚子疼來又摔倒，

I need him right away, 哭叫爸爸立刻到。

Operator can you tell me how 天堂可有電話機？

to find him in this book? 甚麼號碼我要知！

接線小姐請幫助，

Is heaven in the yellow part, 資料是否黃頁處？

I don’t know where to look. 我不知道請告訴。

I think my mama needs him too, 沒有爸爸來扶持，

at night I hear her cry. 媽媽晚上常哭泣；

I hear her call his name sometimes, 我不知道為何事？

but I really don’t know why. 但聽她叫爸名字。

Maybe if I call him, 如果打電話給他，

he will hurry home to me. 他定立刻趕回家；

Is Heaven very far away, 究竟天堂有多遠，

Is it across the sea? 是否就在海那邊？

He’s been gone a long, long time 他已走了長時間，

he needs to come home now! 應該回家來團圓﹔

I really need to reach him, 我真需要接觸他，

I simply don’t know how. 不知有甚麼方法；

Help me find the number please, 請妳幫忙盡一切，

is it listed under “Heaven”? 號碼可在天堂頁？

I can’t read these big big words, 我是七歲小孩童，

I am only seven. 那些字全看不懂；

I’m sorry operator, 接線小姐不要哭，

I didn’t mean to make you cry, 是否有人來欺負。

Is your tummy hurting too, 妳的肚子也疼嗎？

or is there something in your eye? 還是眼睛有異物！

If I call my church maybe they will know.爸爸常說教會好，

Papa said when we need help

that’s where we should go. 如有困難隨時找﹔

他們可能也知道，

I found the number to my church 天堂到底甚麼號？

tacked up on the wall. 教會號碼寫牆上，

Thank you operator, 想到聯絡心花放，

I’ll give them a call. 謝謝姐姐妳幫忙。